Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Introductions: Ao

Thank you, Ire.

I am happy to report that all members of this team are accounted for as of now.

Chain of command is as follows:
Everyone else

Those who challenge my leadership will be dealt a swift yet painful death.

Antagonize Skoll at your own risk.

Attempting to kill each other will not be permitted.

Incompetence is, I fear, unavoidable given the circumstances, but only to an extent. I fully intend on turning this unit into a competent fighting force, even if the odds are stacked against me. I will prove myself once again.


You’re really gonna leave this shit to me? Am I really the only fucking one who knows what’s going on here?

Really? Fuck. Fine.

This group. Some higher ups thought it would be a great idea to throw a bunch of screw-ups and misfits together, just to see what happens.

I am here for a lot of reasons. Mostly ‘cus of procrastination.

Ao is here ‘cus her last group got killed off under mysterious circumstances. Skoll is here 'cus Skoll follows Ao wherever she goes, for some reason.

Thia is here ‘cus she needs to be knocked down a fucking peg or twenty.

Coyote probably got thrown in with us as an afterthought.

This blog. I don’t fucking know. Cause some terror and chaos and then post here, I guess.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Introductions: Ire

I’d like to take this opportunity to say that this blog is a giant pain in the ass. And a fucking waste of time.


I’ll write. But only ‘cause you motherfuckers won’t leave me alone.

Master has seen fit to place me into a new group. I guess He finally got tired of listening to the many complaints about my lack of cooperation with the last people I was forced to work with. Just because I am a proxy does not mean I have to get along with every single one of my allies. Fuck, given enough motivation I’d gladly slaughter a few of my “brothers and sisters.” Especially the ones who called His attention to my hatred of anything that requires effort. You know who you are and you are all on my hit list.

But more about myself.

I have a wide variety of talents that I refuse to share lest I be made to do more fucking work than I am made to do already. I don’t feel very bragy today, so I’ll keep this real short: I am good at blowing things up and working with technology. I enjoy decapitating people with either a rusty saw or a good old fashioned axe.

Now leave me alone.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011


I will reach the safe house in two days time.

I trust that you have completed your tasks by now, Thia.

Skoll, do not make me come after you. Go back to our assigned meeting place.

Ire, stop procrastinating. When you do find Coyote and return to the safe house, I need you to fix my laptop. There is something wrong with its battery. If you can be bothered to fix it I may be persuaded to lighten your punishment.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Introductions: Thia

I may as well do something remotely productive while I wait around for the rest of you procrastinators.

I do not know why Father has grouped me in with such swine such as you, Ire. With my skills and experience I should be the leader of my own group. But nooo. Here I am, stuck taking orders from someone else. Not that I object to being under the command of someone as adapt as Miss Ao, mind you.

But at the very least I should be paired with someone as talented as I am, not be thrown in with newbies and hotheaded ingrates whose IQs are in the double digits. I am an elite. I do not understand why I was placed here.
At least we have someone like Ao leading us. How did you become team leader anyway, Ao? You are elite as well, if I recall correctly. Seems like a demotion.

I seem to have strayed off topic.

I am Thia. I came into Father’s service willingly after witnessing an awesome display of His power against a pair of sniveling Runners, who just happened to be harassing me at the time. Some call it a happy coincidence, I call it Fate. As cliché as it sounds, as soon as He made me one of His, I knew there was nothing else in the world I’d rather be.

And I serve Him well. I have been in His service for three years, and during that time, I have successfully completed every mission I was ever sent on. I excelled and rose up the “ranks” fairly quickly. I am an expert markswoman, especially with rifles. Before Father found me, I was a sniper. I love my three rifles (Barrett M95, Barrett M98B, Ruger M77) more than anything and anyone else in the world, except for Father. I have also perfected the art of concealing my identity.